What's new in our world...

So, we went to the neurologist today. I have to go - for all that silly epilepsy business. The wife has to go with me as well because the doctor asks things like "how long did your seizure last?" "what was the seizure like?". Maybe I'm the only one who sees how ridiculous it is to ask an epileptic about what was going on during the period of time when she is clearly not conscious and is drooling. Anyways...the wife must be present for these types of questions. If she wasn't, who knows what kind of snide remark would fly out of my mouth.

So...fun things from the neurologists office:

1. She asked how I was handling the hormones..."are they making you kind of crazy?" (grin and wink from the doc). I started to say "yeah...a bit", when the wife comes out with "OOOOOH YEAH". Not necessary...not necessary at all.


2. My epilepsy medication is the same stuff (but different dose) that they prescribe for bipolar disorder. Both the wife and the doc seem to think that this is a helpful coincidence, and I'm better off for the extra mood boost. No offense to those out there with actual bipolar disorder, but between the hormone comment, and this conversation, I'm beginning to think that the wife and the doc are plotting against me.


3. The fertility clinic has hit my only good vein for drawing blood too much, and the lab tech didn't want to hit it again today for the necessary bloodwork. I only have one good vein...tried to explain this to the tech, to no avail. Instead, she thought it would be a good idea to torture my other arm without result, bandage that up, then use an infant's needle to get it out of my hand. I have a welt on my hand, turning into an ugly bruise, and still hurting 12 hours later.

So...that is more fun in my "yes, I'm a human pincushion" saga. The doc is upping my meds a bit - she was concerned that I was scaring the public last month with a seizure in the middle of the Target lawn & garden department. So - next time you see me, don't mind the happy-go-lucky...that's just my bipolar on an upswing.

We have good news, we have bad news...

The good news is that I can drink at all the July 4th festivities this weekend!

The bad news is...well, you all know what the bad news is... :-(

Can't help it...pondering mortality...

Well, this has been a strange week. First Farrah Fawcett - expected, but still sad. Michael Jackson, sudden and strange - but not worthy of 2 days of CNN dedicated coverage, in my opinion. Now I pop open CNN and the OxyClean guy has died. Seems like, all of a sudden, folks in the public eye are dropping like flies.

Kind of makes me ponder my own mortality. What would happen if I were to suddenly drop dead? I handle the paying of the bills...I don't even think the wife knows the PIN for our joint bank account. She probably wouldn't understand my filing system, and would have no clue where to find our bills, or when things are due. I have good life insurance, but wouldn't have a clue as to how she would actually get that money...do they call you? I don't know.

Then there are the possible future children. That would be a quagmire of complication for the wife. I'm going to re-do my will once we're pregnant, so that the wife is legally protected there. But still, even with a iron-clad will leaving the children in the care of the wife, moving that through the courts will be time-consuming and possibly expensive. That is assuming that one of my estranged family members doesn't try to complicate matters by throwing a wrench into the legal process. I dearly hope they don't, but I have plenty of friends who will attest to the parental standing of the wife, biology and legality notwithstanding. I think she's locked in for keeping the kids, but that doesn't mean that it won't be a lot of headache.

Also, what would happen with my job? I have all kinds of stuff that I do - that nobody knows about. How would folks figure out what I was working on, and how to find files and such that I've saved if I wasn't there to tell them? And how would the wife let them know? She doesn't even know my boss' last name. I guess she could call the receptionist over there - they could look that up for her. But it would probably help if she already had that number, and didn't have to try and find it.

After going through my mom's long hospitalization, I found out first hand how hard it is to try to get a handle on someone else's life and finances when they can't tell you where to find things. I don't want the wife to have to go through that - at least my mom kept a book of her usernames for all the websites for all her bills (thank goodness for her horrible memory). I just had to crack her passwords, and I'm fairly certain the wife wouldn't know how to do that for me. So at the very least, I'll write up a cheat sheet for the wife on where to find things, how to get into all our various accounts and bills, and what she would need to do in case I didn't come home one day. You guys should think about that too - what is it, in your life with your family, that you do that your spouse doesn't have to worry about (or the other way around)? You and your spouse should write all that down, just in case he/she does find themselves in the tragic position of having to worry about it someday.

Terms of endearment...

Every couple has their cute little names...you know...honey...sweetie...sugar lips...that sort of thing. I tend to call the wife honey, sometimes schnookie...usually very sweet names. Occasionally she gets called George (yeah, I dunno where I got that one either). The wife? Whole different story. Some of the more memorable ones were Peach Pie, Apple Cobbler, Creamed Corn, and Blueberry Muffin. See a pattern? I can't remember all the deserts and side dishes that I've been called.

Her all time favorite though, is not food related. Most of the time the woman calls me Guiseppe. People really look at us strange in the Target when she calls from a row over "Hey! Guiseppe!", and I come around the corner with a "what do you want!?!"

This is one of those things I miss when I'm travelling for work...the wife yelling "Guiseppe!" from the other end of the house. :-)

Poor little kitty eyes...

Wow...that ASPCA commercial kills me. You know the one, with Sarah McLaughlin and the really pitiful dogs and cats...with the sad music and voice-over about abused animals? I hate that commercial. It has me positively weepy.

Or are those the side effects from the Clomid? hmmm...

(if you haven't seen it - check out the Canadian version here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9gspElv1yvc) It's not just me right???

The good drugs...

We are sitting here in Hilton Head - enjoying a very relaxing vacation. We've been sitting out on the beach, eating good food, and taking it easy. I've got a bit of a tan, and the wife looks like a lobster (and we've had her under an umbrella the whole time - I guess the cheap Wal-Mart umbrella doesn't block all the rays). All in all, it's a standard beach vacation.

So, last night was my final dose of Clomid. This is the drug that encourages my ovaries to develop more than one egg...increasing our chances of getting pregnant. Side effects include hot flashes and mood swings. Sitting out on the beach for the last two days, I doubt I would have noticed a hot flash...and as far as I can tell, I haven't been an emotional wreck. I'm hoping that holds out - the wife is a bit nervous about me going nuts.

We'll let you guys know how it goes. I'm headed back out to the beach now...go ahead...be jealous. :-)

Are you as tired of this as I am?

OK...I'm sure you guys are tired of hearing about our challenges reproductively. But since you're so nice to care, I feel compelled to bore you with the play by play. So - no go again this month.

We plug along - we're settling in for the long haul - so I'm hoping to not torture you guys with the up and down monthly. Of course, I may need to vent and will torture you all anyways. But I expect to start yabbering about fluff again, and will hopefully only report back with good news when we get it - eventually.

On a humorous note, a friend and her husband were discussing this, and he concluded that my body's genetic makeup probably causes it to not be accepting of sperm. Makes sense - the lesbian thing means that relationships with men aren't my thing, so it definitely could follow that my uterus has the same disposition in relation to the little guys. I'm now talking to it and trying to convince it that we need to be accepting of the little guys - they're just helping us out, and we're not going against our genetic makeup to let them. Kind of like the guys out back fixing the yard - we are going to let them help, and aren't going to throw them out just because of their gender. OK...now it sounds like we're just using the male population. Sorry about that guys...I guess it is the ugly truth.