Life, and lessons learned...

Hello again all! I'm sorry for being absent from this blog so much...when I have time, I'm so tired, and have nothing to say. The rest of the time, I have no time. Surely life will settle at some point.

So my mom has improved, and is coming out of the hospital today. Because she was there for almost 6 weeks, she is going to a nursing facility (fancy name for a nursing home). So, today, I take my 59-year-old mother to a nursing home. Never quite thought my 30s would look like this.

About a week after this whole thing started up with my mom in December, I came down with a cold. I went to the doctor...because I simply had no time to be sick...the mom was in critical condition. My doctor wasn't in, so I saw another doctor in the practice. Well...I don't understand the aversion to giving someone antibiotics...but he asked about everything going on with my mother, all her diagnosis...the whole 9. I think he was just nosy. Then he made the comment "wow, I bet you hope all that isn't genetic". Gee...thanks doofy head. Now I'm worried about my future health, the health of my children, in addition to trying to keep my mother among the living. Yeah. I needed that.

Well, it wasn't as if the thought hasn't crossed my mind. I believe that my mother's health is the result of living at a stress level for 30 years that most of us can't even imagine, hating and avoiding doctors until it is on the very edge of too late, in addition to some bad decisions and some bad luck. I, on the other hand, try to take care of myself...sworn off stress where I can, and go to the doctor when I need to. I think I'm made of better stuff.

Due to the drama, we've made a lot of promises around here lately. I promise to never be my mother (that's a big one...the wife likes that one). I promise to take care of you when you get sick, and you darn well better do the same. We promise to be parents, and do what we can to allow our children to be caretakers to their own children, not us.

The doctors are hopeful that my mom can go back home to her life eventually. I hope so too. Sticking my mother in a home at this point is a little depressing for both her and I. But in all the things she's never understood about being and staying healthy, I've learned so much.

There is one thing I've learned, but hope never to pass onto my children. Some of the most powerful life lessons I got from my parents were learned by watching them fail. Unfortunately, I've learned more from their mistakes than I ever learned from their teachings. For me, it has made me stronger, more independent, and just more aware of my decisions and path in life. However, I want to find a way to instill strength and independence in my children in another manner...setting an example of success they want to follow, rather than an example of failure that they want to avoid. I sincerely hope that can give these kids the same character and strength that I have, without the hefty price tag.